Book - The Complete Book of Questions:

1001 Conversation Starters for Any Occasion

This book provides groups with 1,001 engaging and thought-provoking icebreaker questions to start and sustain meaningful conversations.

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Pivotal Gold Members – request this book for free. Not a member yet? Information here

More on Communication and conversation

Some Thoughts on the Lost Art of Reading Aloud

Sometimes the best way to understand the present is to look at it from the past. Consider audio books. An enormous number of Americans read by listening these days — listening aloud, I call it. The technology for doing so is diverse and widespread, and so are the places people listen to audio books. But from the perspective of a reader in, say, the early 19th century, about the time of Jane Austen, there is something peculiar about it, even lonely. >>> more ...

Your subconscious mind holds the key to mastering social finesse!

• Do parties or social gatherings make you nervous?

• Do you suffer from low self-esteem, social anxiety, acute shyness or loneliness?

• Do you find it difficult to meet and talk to new people?

• Are you convinced that people ignore you, avoid you or won't like you?

• Are you too scared to suggest a meeting or a date?

• Are you sick of seeing yourself as a "wall flower" or an "outcast" and, worse, not liking yourself because of that perception?

Everyone is special and has equal ability to light up a room! You don't have to be outgoing to be a master of social finesse - you can simply have a great smile, or could be a sympathetic or enthusiastic listener for one person at a time.

This hypnosis CD or MP3 will power your mind to be a master of social finesse, and enable you to naturally:

• Improve your natural confidence and self-esteem.

• Be able to function without "masks", or your old ways or habits that you hide behind, which prevent the "real you" from relaxing and enjoying yourself.

• Learn how to focus on the moment or on the person you're speaking to - instead of yourself, your appearance or your fears.

• Eliminate debilitating shyness and allow yourself to shine as brightly as you want, whenever you want!

• Relate and find things in common with anyone that you happen to come into contact with.

• Learn the power of a smile and when to use it to your advantage.

• Learn how to be brave enough to strike up a conversation

• Handle confronting situations or difficult times when you don't know what to say - with easy-to-implement solutions, such as asking questions about the person you're talking to & then listening well for clues on how to continue the conversation.

• Banish phobias and fears that the 'wrong thing' will come out.

• Establish your back up "safety net" of knowing how to instantly and naturally calm yourself, handle or resolve things, or make amends, if awkwardness surfaces.

• Understand body language and be more aware of a person's signals when you're speaking to them- and learn better ways to react accordingly.

• Learn how to self-assess appropriately with brilliant tips and tricks such as knowing when to tone it down, when (and when not) to check your appearance or your surroundings; when to speak and when to listen.

You'd be surprised just how many people find social finesse difficult - but it can be easier than you think - Act Now!

100% Money Back Guarantee!

How to develop great communication skills

The vast majority of people by nature have a fascination with the sound of their own voice - which often shows itself in their desire to keep on talking. However, there is quite a bit of difference between talking and communicating, with the latter requiring consistent application of effort. People with really good communication skills know what to say at precisely the right moment, at what location and to who. More importantly, they know when not to speak at all, and just actively listen.

There are specific key traits that show whether a person is a great communicator or not - one of the se is being a really good listener. You may be able to communicate your points of view and general thoughts to another person in a clear way, but when it comes to listening to other people, you are simply "in the dark". With most individuals, the quality of listening is directly related to their personal understanding of information, and with the constantly evolving situation in the business world today, superb listening skills are absolutely necessary for achieving success.

Here are some tips that will help you to improve your listening skills: 1. Pay attention to what the other person is talking about. It's quite important to pay attention to the speaker, and it is not only the matter of maintaining good eye contact, but the posture of your entire body is important as well. 2. Let the other person speak. Patience is the essence of any good communication ability. It's important during the act of listening that you should allow the other person to put forward his/her opinions, while making a point to not interrupt in the middle of the discussion. 3. Do not impose your opinion. To avoid conflict, you should respect the opinions of others, and at the same time, try not to impose your opinions on others either, as it often happens that the opinions of any two people don't even remotely come close to common ground. 4. Ask meaningful questions. It is important that during a discussion only meaningful questions pertaining to the discussion are asked or raised. These questions should always direct the conversation towards a useful conclusion. 5. Help and support the other individual. Great listening requires developing a supportive feeling for everyone speaking in order to help them sense that everything is going smoothly. Encourage the other individual, and make them sense that you're interested in listening to his/her opinions and views. 6. Restate your thoughts. Listening is quite different from hearing, and it's not the easiest of skills to master. Although listening by itself will definitely help you to gain some understanding, or at the very least help you to get to a point of view, it is still very important that at the close of every discussion you should be able to easily restate, in order, all of the previous ideas. It is quite true that the more you listen, the more effective and efficient you become. Many of you may be experienced in speaking, but have you ever really thought of the true value of listening? The tips listed above may not ensure that you'll be suddenly transformed into a great listener, but what they certainly will do is hone your listening skills to a great degree, thereby directly affecting your overall communication ability. Copyright (c) 2009 Alan Gillies Alan Gillies is the Managing Director of the L2L Group, specialising in providing Executive Coaching, Training and Consultancy Services to Businesses across the Globe. Want to learn more about these business success strategies? Get Alan's popular FREE ebook, available at http://www.L2LGroup.com.

8 tips for finding your voice

Q : I know that agents and editors look for writers who have strong voices, but I’m having trouble finding mine. Any advice?

A : It’s true. Editors, agents, publishers and, above all, readers do respond most to a writer with a great voice.

Voice is what gives writing energy, authenticity, it animates the narrator and characters with a unique personality. It grabs your attention and keeps you turning the page. ... more

How Does the Brain Form Sentences?

Forming a grammatically correct sentence may seem to require advanced cognitive skills, but it turns out that our creative language capacity might rely on a less sophisticated system than is commonly thought. A recent study suggests that our ability to construct sentences may arise from procedural memory—the same simple memory system that lets our dogs learn to sit on command. >>>

7 Steps to Better E-Mail Management

It's easy to get overwhelmed by your in-box, but these simple strategies can help you keep it all under control ... more

What did you say? Ways to create effective listening skills

Have you ever caught yourself finishing another personâ??s sentence? Or have you interrupted a business contact to add your own comments before you even heard the other person out? What about interpreting what someone else said completely wrong because we did not let them finish their sentences or explain their point more clearly?

Here are some ways to create better and more productive conversations, stronger relationships and increase your bottom line. >>>

How to work a room

There are tons of networking events to attend - too many, actually. Too many ways to meet people you'll never see again, too many opportunities to collect a stack of business cards you'll never look at again. But it's well worth doing as much networking as you can, because you never know where a chance meeting will lead. Last year, for example, I was hired to give a presentation at a secluded resort near Honolulu, Hawaii - all because of a conversation I struck up with a woman sitting next to me at a luncheon.

Here are 13 simple tips to make the process easier and more productive. >>>

Book: You’re Too Kind : A Brief History of Flattery

You’re Too Kind : A Brief History of Flattery

by Richard Stengel

From the reviews

Stengel (a senior editor at Time magazine) ponders the meaning of flattery and illustrates that more than mere praise, flattery is praise with a motive, be it benign or grasping.

You’re Too Kind is a witty, colorful, fast-paced trip through history. It’s meticulously researched and comprehensive. .... more

Communication is the key

Communication is such a touchy subject. Although we all do it all the time, there are so many layers that make communication so difficult, and also so exciting and fun! First of all, there is a layer of assumptions. We often believe that we all come to the table with the same understandings, the same values, the same meanings. But, truly, we don’t. ... more

Editing America

The other day a man wearing a brown fedora strolled through Pike Place Market. Unlike most tourists, he wasn't there to browse or buy. He was there to edit.Yes, edit. Toting markers, chalk and white-out, the man known as the Indiana Jones of typos had come to do battle with this city's misspellings and botched punctuation. Seattle, bookish as it may claim to be, was revealed to be barely literate. There was the sign for "Dillettante" chocolate. The board announcing "Todays sample." The posters for "recepies," "cake's," "birthday candell's." The parking-lot warning that you get "no in/out priveleges." More ....

Business Buzzwords That Make You Gag

Readers wrote in with their nominees for this column's first-ever Most Annoying Lingo awards (the Mallies).

Find out which phrases they would like purged from our professional conversations.

.. more

Ten-Minute Creative Writing Exercise

Creative Writing on the Fly

If you think you don't have time to write, think again. See what you can produce with a simple set of writing prompts and ten minutes of your time with this creative writing exercise inspired by Rita Dove's exercise "Ten-Minute Spill."

... more

How would YOU like to be the LIFE and SOUL of ANY social gathering?

How would YOU like to be the LIFE and SOUL of ANY social gathering?

Let's be honest. We all LOVE those individuals that make us LAUGH.

The funnier you are, the more people like you.

Well, how funny are YOU?

What if you could suddenly become EVEN FUNNIER, just by following a few simple rules?

Master wit Max Matterson has worked in the comedy world for the past 20 years. He's the co-author of "Comedy Writing Secrets" and trained many of the big late night show hosts.

He knows EXACTLY how to train ANYONE to become super-witty in just minutes. Matterson claims there are just a series of simple rules that ANYONE can follow to become hilariously funny!

Do YOU want to discover his COMEDY SECRETS?

Visit his website online and learn more: http://www.consultpivotal.com/Afunny.htm

Max shares EVERYTHING with you -- and GUARANTEES that your new-found funny skills will ROCKET your business and social life. In fact he'll buy back the course if you're not absolutely THRILLED!

When was the last time you invested even FIVE MINUTES in developing your social skills? Especially in something as important as your HUMOR?

Do it now. Click HERE and get started: http://www.consultpivotal.com/Afunny.htm

Latest Booklists for kids

Here they are ... the latest booklists from Pivotal Kids The 2009 Indies Choice Book Awards

St Patrick's Day

Children's Choice Book Awards 2009

Step-by-Step/Sequencing picture books

The Newbery Medal 2009

Is Social Networking Slowing Down the Generational Lines of Communication?

Lately it seems like the social communication behavior and methods people use to interact are more like tangled-up power lines. Years ago there were traditionally only a small handful of ways to communicate; at work, phone, fax and face-to-face. For the last ten years or so many generations have been able to adopt email as a crucial form of communication, but now there are many newer social networking methods of communication between consumers, businesses, friends and families.

... read more

How Not to Stick Your Foot in Your Mouth via E-Mail

E-mail is the most common form of business communication today; it’s among the most common forms of all communication. Yet many people communicate poorly with e-mail.

That’s the opinion of Janis Fisher Chan, and I agree. Chan is the co-founder of Write It Well (http://www.writeitwell.com), a publishing and training firm operating out of Oakland, Calif., that, since 1980, specializes in helping businesspeople write clearly and concisely in e-mail and elsewhere. She also authored the newly published book E-Mail: A Write It Well Guide, as well as eight other books on business writing and additional topics.

I talked with Chan about why we write poorly in e-mail, what consequences this can have, and how we can improve.

... more

Video - What's Your Listening Level?

How well do you listen when you're in a conversation? Communication expert Dr. Bill Lampton describes Stephen Covey's five listening levels, and challenges you to accept the highest level.

This week's Must-reads

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Latest children's book reviews at the Pivotal Network

(click on the pictures to go to the reviews)

The 39 Clues: The Sword Thief by Peter Lerangis	39 Clues. Book 1 - The Maze of Bones by Rick Riordan	Payback by Melody Carlson	The Runaway Dolls by Ann M. Martin	Remember as you pass me by by L. King Perez

3D Alphabet book

KIDS READING

Watch this Video of a fantastic 3D alphabet book

[More Books for Kids]

Red-Hot Sales Negotiation

: Everything You Need to Know to Close Deals, Build Relationships, and Create Win-Win Outcome by sPaul S. Goldner, Peter McKeon

Negotiation is more than just closing a sale. It’s the art of continuing a partnership that is successful for both parties. Red-Hot Sales Negotiation provides practical tips and strategies to help salespeople ... more

The Importance of Cross Cultural Communication

The workforce today is considered to be the most diverse in our society to date. The fact that 4 generations of people are all actively working will certainly have some communication barriers or challenges, not to mention that employees of various cultures, ethnicities, disabilities, age groups, etc. will have another set of challenges comingling as one. The key to working with such a diverse group of employees is simple in theory.... more

Famous misquotations

"The British are coming!" – Paul Revere [C] Revere's mission depended on secrecy and the countryside was filled with British army patrols; also, most colonial residents at the time considered themselves British. The quotation is more likely based on (although not taken verbatim from) the later famous poem "Paul Revere's Ride." The alarm, if Revere had said it out loud, would most likely have been worded, "The Regulars are coming out!" This one and many more from the Wikipedia page List of Misquotations

Banish the Presenter Box

It's time to stop hiding behind a mask when you present. Instead, think of public speaking as an exploration of your personal boundaries and limits—and the opportunity to be yourself. (A commentary) ... more

Want to change the way people respond to you?

This is the key to what's been holding you back your entire life!

Skyrocket Your Self Esteem, Transform Your Voice in Minutes A Day, Eliminate Fear of Public Speaking... And Command Instant Respect From The People You Meet.

Now for the first time, you can discover:

• The one mistake even professional singers make that drains the power from their voice... and the secret pencil trick that shortcuts your way to a voice that commands respect.

• How to master your natural voice in the shortest time possible... while you improve your level of communication with everyone you meet! (You'll learn everything those stars paid thousands of dollars for!)

• Why "beginners" are able to use these simple techniques to quickly surpass more experienced professionals... even if you sound like the Wicked Witch of the West!

• How an ordinary pillow helped all-pro linebacker Dick Butkus transform from football star to television analyst. (Not one voice coach in a thousand even suspects the power of this simple technique!)

• A stunning secret revealed by singer Mel Torme which offers an insight into his lifetime success.

• How to instantly diagnose mistakes in your voice — so you'll never have a communication problem again. No one will ever mistake what you are saying.

• How Lucie Arnaz overcame an allergic reaction that inflamed her vocal folds and used an instant mind-body secret to sing like a nightingale! • How you can dictate your own identity to the world – as you want it to be – and not have it dictated to you!

"My Name Is Bond – James Bond""Arthur Joseph started as a teacher of mine years ago. Over these years, he has become a good friend whose teachings of Vocal Awareness have become a constant in my life. He enlightens with compassion and understanding of the human spirit and above all else, it works." - Pierce Brosnan, Actor

Isn't it frustrating? You speak as clear as a bell and people misunderstand what you say. Even worse, people misjudge you for no apparent reason! People spend thousands on Lasik surgery to improve their eyes, tens of thousands to change their nose, cheeks, and chest, yet not a penny to change the way they sound. But for the first time ever...

You Can Transform Your Life in Minutes A Day! Get more information, now, on the Vocal Power Course.

Money Inspires People to Lose Weight, Study Says

If the long-term health benefits of weight loss do not inspire people to diet and exercise, some immediate financial incentives just might, a study published Tuesday suggests. http://adjix.com/hzx

Icoste books

http://www.icoste.com/538_Books.htm Icoste features thousands of books for many types of interest. They also claim to find the cheapest one for you on the internet saving you time and effort.

Books _ This week’s Must-reads …

A Fraction of the Whole by Steve Stolz

The Lost Dog by Michelle de Kretser

The Night Has a Thousand Eyes by Mandy Sayer

Under a Blood Red Sky by Kate Furnivall

The Lieutenant by Kate Grenville

You can read all the reviews of these books at http://www.pivotalbookclub.com/read_right_now.htm

Video - Managing your communication skills

Communication skills is a never ending journey of discovery, of ourselves, and of others. This presentation provides the most accessible techniques for improving and perfecting your communication skills.

Test your spelling

Results from a Spelling Society survey reveal that we are a society that can't spell. But is our 'irregular' spelling system holding us back? Whether you're one of the 25% of adults who reckons they have a 'problem' with spelling, or the 66% who spurns the use of a spell-checker, try our fiendish test to find out whether your spelling is a recommendation, or just an embarrassment. And just to make it more difficult for US readers – who performed less well in the Spelling Society survey – UK spelling rules apply

Every presentation is an opportunity to improve

Every audience is an opportunity to improve your skills. Every audience is an opportunity to do better than last time. (Here's an example from a previous post.)Whether an audience is big or small, or your presentation is ten minutes or 90 minutes long, every audience deserves your best. http://coachlisab.blogspot.com/2009/02/every-presentation-is-opportunity-to.html

The love of reading

In a rare version of her essay, Virginia Woolf muses on the complex pleasure and art of being a reader At this late hour of the world's history books are to be found in every room of the house - in the nursery, in the drawing room, in the dining room, in the kitchen. And in some houses they have collected so that they have to be accommodated with a room of their own. Novels, poems, histories, memoirs, valuable books in leather, cheap books in paper - one stops sometimes before them and asks in a transient amazement what is the pleasure I get, or the good I create, from passing my eyes up and down these innumerable lines of print? Reading is a very complex art - the hastiest examination of our sensations as a reader will show us that much. And our duties as readers are many and various. But perhaps it may be said that our first duty to a book is that one should read it for the first time as if one were writing it. more ..... http://adjix.com/s5uk

Snarky Communicators

Do you live with someone or work around a person who is short-tempered or irritable? Are you aware that a moody person drains the energy of positive people who are powerful communicators? The purpose of snide remarks – known as snarky comments – is to hurt you and catch you off guard by sarcastically twisting the truth. Your self-confidence is poisoned and your hopeful mind is obliterated with negative thinking. http://adjix.com/2vig

“E-stalk,” “jumbrella,” etc. -The Open Dictionary

“E-stalk,” “jumbrella,” and “shovel-ready”— just a sampling of the creative new words and expressions recently submitted by the public to Merriam-Webster’s Open Dictionary. Read on for their definitions… http://adjix.com/2fza

9 Tips To Help You Write More Powerful Emails

By Suzan St Maur

1. Make the effort to learn about the etiquette (these days known as "netiquette") involved in writing emails. There are loads of good reference websites and books about the internet which will tell you the basics. I know it might seem a bit precious to attach so much importance to social niceties when the internet is basically very informal. However, whether we like it or not many people do take online etiquette very seriously. So if you're writing emails for business, you should assume that your recipient may well be one of those...

read on ...

The Art of Persuasion - Synchronizing tips

The power to connect with others is by far the most important skill you should develop. If you are ever to succeed in business and more importantly in life you need to have the ability to connect, because that is the essence of business. Persuasion and Influence happen on many subtle levels not just through the verbal medium. Below are a few tips to keep in mind that will help you have a more meaningful connection. http://ivancampuzano.com/the-art-of-persuasion-synchronizing-tips/

Put a Sharp Point on Your Written Communications

It’s not unusual to get 20 or 200 emails a day. I know someone who gets 2000! If you look at the ones you’ve received (and include snail-mail letters too), you will see that the majority start with “I.” You typically see, “I’ve attached . . . I hear . . . I wanted to thank you . . . I’m cc’ing . . . I reviewed . . .” Let me suggest that instead of starting with “I,” start your written communications with “You.” For example: Read more: "Put a Sharp Point on Your Written Communications | Personal Growth Development" - http://ivancampuzano.com/put-a-sharp-point-on-your-written-communications/#ixzz0EbziWdSJ&A

Modern and Creative Bookshelf Designs

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2009 Banished Words List

[Via Britannica Blog] Lake Superior State University “maverick” word-watchers, fresh from the holiday “staycation” but without an economic “bailout” even after a “desperate search,” have issued their 34th annual List of Words to Be Banished from the Queen’s English for Mis-use, Over-use and General Uselessness. This year’s list may be more “green” than any of the previous lists and includes words and phrases that people from “Wall Street to Main Street” say they love “not so much” and wish to have erased from their “carbon footprint.” —Lake Superior State University press release (click here for full listing of words).