ASSERTIVENESS – HOW DO YOU RATE?

Hello, This is part One of a series of posts on Assertiveness. In this first one, we'll look at how you rate. Part Two will cover the reasons behind our behaviour and Part Three, ways to make our communication as successfully assertive as possible. So how do you rate ....? Do you wish you had the confidence to speak your mind? Do you feel you have the respect of your family and co-workers? Would you like to improve your relationships? Let's take a step back, then, and think about how you interact with your family, friends and the people at work. Are you assertive? § Confident § Express feelings without hostility § Resist peer pressure § Respect yourself § Take responsibility for your own needs § Stand up for your rights Are you aggressive? § Demand rather than ask § Angry when someone disagrees with you § Need to win § Express own feelings at the expense of others’ § Feel threatened § Feel frustration at not being able to express your needs Are you Submissive? § Unable to express feelings or needs honestly § Lacking self-respect § Fear making mistakes, displeasing others or being selfish § Remain silent when something is a problem § Feel guilty saying no § Have difficulty asking for assistance How did you rate? If you are not happy with your rating, or feel the need to be different, take comfort in the fact that it is your behaviour that we are evaluating here, not you. And behaviour is something we can change. It is something we can observe, evaluate and adapt, step by step. Achieving the most effective communication will allow us to meet our needs without denying the feelings and needs of others. In Part Two of this series on Assertiveness, we look at some of the reasons why people have an imbalance towards aggression or passivity, and the benefits of redressing that balance. In the meantime, to develop confident communication skills, visit an ITC club.